Under The Gun

IMG_0337It’s Tuesday, as you may or may not know 😉  I’m studying for an exam in Theories of Personality and for my insurance license.  I have to start working while I’m in school because I am running out of savings and running out of financial aid.  In order to graduate I am going to have to pay out of pocket for some of my classes.  This means I can’t just work at the corner store or fast food I have to make enough money to pay for living expenses and pay for classes.

I’m so close to graduating, I only have a year left until I get my bachelors degree in Social Psychology.  The pressure is intense in your junior year and I imagine it’s going to get more intense as I go into my senior year.  I am constantly reminding myself to stay positive and to fight off negative and anxious feelings.  I have to remind myself not to retreat into television, games on my phone, a good book.  I have to remind myself that this is supposed to be hard and it’s OK and that I am up to this challenge.

I will also be writing an op ed piece for a local newspaper soon on student debt.  This is of course a subject that affects me in great ways and if I can use my voice to help myself and all the other students that struggle to move out of poverty then I will find a way to make it work.  It’s scary though, putting my voice out there.  Here in my safe little blog I know there are not a lot of readers and those that read are also writers and while they may internally criticize my writing they generally would not express that criticism in the comments.  They know.  They know what it is to take this risk.  To put your heart into something and lay it out for the world.  It’s a love, passion, compulsion but it is also a risk because at anytime someone can throw out those critical words that nearly break you.

Put some positive vibes out for me or leave some words of encouragement.  I need it this week.  If you would like to learn more about me see these links to some blog posts published on the Valore Books Blog:

Ellen’s Story

A Year to Remember

I love comments.  Leave me one and I’ll follow your blog and comment in kind.


Published by E or Ms. Lioness

Poet, survivor and thriver. Neurodivergent and not afraid to show it. Mental health advocate, trauma survivor, Dx: Depression, anxiety, panic, C-PTSD, ADHD and there is a very strong change I reside within a spectrum you may have heard of…. I accept that there is darkness in me. I accept that when you have experienced trauma, for much of your life, there is no escaping your dark side. I choose to be mostly good and I accept that the good and bad is all mine.

2 thoughts on “Under The Gun

  1. In running, there is a common saying “Put the miles in now, and the speed will come later.” From my perspective, that statement is so true. If you are not a runner however, a liberal interpretation would still appear to be very valid. “Put the work in now, and the rewards will come later.” You appear to be doing quite well with your chosen programs, and they will provide you with many opportunities later in life. Please look at your education as the key to open the door of your future and, if even if you change career paths in years to come (statistically we go throw 3 career changes during our working life), what you are doing now will always be with you. Have a great day … get studying…. and let us know how your exams go! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    1. I’m already into my second career change or at least will be when I earn my degree. One exam down for now, 2 upcoming and of course a few papers. Still plugging along. Thanks for the visit!


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